Plans, plans, plans.

Feel like I've got my life a little bit back on track. Boys are at school, I went for a run, sent off four stories and have had lunch. I then briefly had a panic because I had no emails to answer or anything important to do. I then realised that I need to make myself a little plan. Wrestle some control back into my life. In a minute I'm going to sit down on my bed and write down some daily plans, but what about my monthly goals, my yearly ones? Blimey, am I just stressing myself out unnecessarily? Am I turning into Bridget Jones? Probably. 

What I want:

• to feel healthy. Recently I've been feeling and looking like a fat slob. I've got a big pimple on my cheek (which because it's grown over my v. small, colourless mole, is actually cancer, dontcha know?). I need to get back running and off to the gym again. If I can do a little something each day, I'll feel good. Today I ran along the river. It was really good despite wheezing like an old man, and I felt so alive when I returned home. I showered, cleaned the bathroom, dried my hair and put on make up with such efficient zeal because I was (literally) up and running. Mind you, I did meet Alison half-way into my run and I stopped, walked along with her and Wavey the dog and chatted. She's so lovely. Been waiting 11 years to have a child and still waiting. Christ, poor Ali.
• to be creative. I need to write and I think I feel a little out of sorts at the moment because I'm not actually writing something. Instead I'm thinking about writing and making notes, which I love, but it's not quite the same. Perhaps I need to give myself some deadlines and some themes and do a bit of flash fiction every now and again. Put it in my diary. Sue would be the best person to do this with. Or on my own. Sue has sent me a link for a website which eats your words if you don't do them fast enough.
• Research. I need to research my dissertation. I love doing this but if I plan it in I'll feel like it's actually taking me somewhere.
• to have fun. Going out with Ishbel and the girls on Saturday was really fun. I need to do it again. I need to dance, laugh etc. I'm always so worthy all the bloody time. You can see that by my to do list.

These are all the things I'm wanting to do. There are other things that I feel I should do. The bloody laundry for instance, or perhaps get a job so that people don't sneer at me, or make plans about holidays etc. But I don't even want to think about these right now. I'll get on and plan in the things that I do want to do.